Friday, June 13, 2008

Oh no you didn't!

Mr. W: Here. (Handing me some object)

Me: What's this?

W: It's your's.

Me: My what? What the f*** is THIS?

W: An AARP card. I joined AARP for us. It's good until 2013.

Me: What?

W: You get discounts.

Me: I'd rather pay full price. I am NOT old enough to be a member of AARP.

W: Yes you are. You only have to be (he names a number)

Me: GET MY NAME OFF OF THIS!

W: It's a good thing. They lobby for healthcare and stuff. You get all kinds of discounts.

Me: I'm not joining AARP.

W: Too late. You're a member.

Me: You can't do this. Did you forge my name?

W: No, there were no signatures involve.

Actually, there a really nice interview with Martin Sheen in this month's magazine. I read it. I also checked out the gel pads for the kitchen in the ads in the back.

And I am, after all, going to be a grandma in a couple of weeks.

This sucks. (the getting old part, not the grandma part)

3 Comments:

Blogger Fecund Stench said...

Congratulations on one if not the other.

June 14, 2008 2:50 PM  
Anonymous herb said...

If I remember correctly, they first contacted me in my 20s.

We will be assimilated.

June 18, 2008 11:51 PM  
Blogger Amanda said...

A friend of mine has been an AARP member since he was 30. He says one day he wants them to show up at his home with balloons saying he is their oldest member at 103. They will probably wonder why he is so well preserved.

June 25, 2008 8:56 PM  

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